Thursday, August 26, 2010

Here I Sit

It's 11:00 p.m. I should be heading to bed but for the last few night I lay in bed with thoughts swirling through my head. I don't sleep for a long, long time. It's not anxiety keeping me up, it's excitement. Tonight however anxiety crept in. Tomorrow night is our Opening Celebration. I've been busy getting the word out about the preschool and the celebration. I've had some inquiries and invited those parents to come. The cakes are cooling, the "to do before 3:00 p.m." list is sitting on my desk. Just like that panic starting to set in. What if no one comes? "Don't be silly, your friends are coming!" Yes, but what if no one signs up? "Parents will sign their kids up." The doubts work their way in and I push them out, but the seed of doubt has been planted and tonight is looking like a sleepless, restless night.

I start browsing online hoping to get sleepy. I randomly start wondering who has my book, Please Don't Move the Muffin Tin by Bev Bos. Did I loan it to someone? Did I sell it to Powell's Books? For no reason other than she's on my mind, I google Bev. Lo and behold she has a blog! I click around and come across this.

I need to be faithful to the process. I've done the work to get this far, I have the support of family and friends. Now I need to trust. I do with all my heart. I'll will hold that thought as I drift off tonight. I didn't find my book, but I've found Bev and her wise words. All is good.