Are You Ready?

Tell me your story. How did you become a parent? Did things go as planned? Are you comfortable in your role as a parent? Are you overwhelmed? Do you think you could feel better, have more fun, enjoy your children and your life, but don't quite know where to start?

Are you ready? Are you ready to make 2012 the year where you start living your life with purpose and joy? Are you ready to be the parent you know you can be? Are you ready to face the challenges with vigor and anticipation?

I'm offering five (5) one on one coaching sessions at no cost to the first five (5) parents who contact me. The coaching will take place the month of February with one session a week. Each session will be catered to the individual family situation. Each week will focus on a specific topic. By the end of the five sessions you will be able to notice a wonderful difference in the atmosphere in your home, in your attitude towards your children, and you will notice a difference in your children's attitudes.

Week 1 -- Identify the parent you want to be.

• Work to set manageable goals for you, your home and your children.

Week 2 -- Declutter your environment.

• We will work to declutter your physical environment and your also to declutter your mind of ideas or goals that are no longer working for you.
  

Week 3 -- Start your Action Plan

• Implement the goals and expectations from you first week. Learn how to bring your kids on board without a struggle.

Week 4 -- Review, Adjust and Thrive

• Look at what's working, what needs to be changed or challenged. Continue to grow into your role as a parent.
  

Week 5 -- Plan for Change

• Your child will not be a toddler or adolescent forever. Plan and guide yourself into the adult relationship you'll have with your child someday. (This is my favorite and most exciting class)
  

The coaching will be one on one. NO ONE else will be listening in on our conversation so it's completely confidential. It can take place in person, if you are local or via a teleconference if you are from out of town. These sessions are limited to only five parents so don't delay in scheduling yours today. Go to the Contact Me page on this blog to get started. I'm so excited! I hope your ready!

2012

The New Year has begun to slowly unfold before us. We are thrilled to be providing children a place to learn, to explore and to enjoy their many varied talents. As we plan for 2012, we want to include parents into the mix. We never stop learning, exploring or enjoying. It's not child's play, it's life. This year we will be launching classes for adults. You'll be learning to be a role model (or perhaps recognizing that you already are), you'll be learning to parent and/or mentor consciously and with purpose.

Stay tuned for more information soon. In the meantime, we wish you much love and prosperity in 2012.

A New Life, A New World

I haven't posted recently because although we've been open and working, life has taken over every free moment of my time, literally! Meet me precious granddaughter. Audrey Elise was born October 5, 2011 at 11:13 p.m. She weighed 7 lbs 15 oz and was 21 inches long.







So when I'm not working with other wonderful children, I'm holding this precious little one. I'll be posting again soon, but some things in life are just so important that everything else, especially blogging, pales in comparison.

Government Reform

Government does not trust parents to raise their children. Anyone in government would argue that this is not true, but I see it everywhere. It's not just government, it's teachers, business, therapists etc. We have a culture of professionals that know more, know better, know the answers and we the parents are left a bit flummoxed as to how to raise our kids. Government tries it's darnest to help, to close the gap between the have's and the have nots, but they fail to see many things. First, how are the have's and have nots defined? Is it strictly socioeconomic or are there other conditions factored in? WARNING: I'm about to get very honest and not at all politically correct. The government tries to help but in essence creates some unintended consequences. One of the first problems created by this atmosphere of professionals and government programs is that it undermines parents and families. I have spoken with several young unwed mothers who have very honestly told me that they live with their child's father but that there are no plans to get married because the government gives unwed mothers so much help in the form of money, free programs etc., that it doesn't financially behoove them to get married. Granted a few mother's is not a scientific study, but I bet I'm not too far off the mark in saying that government programs are hindering the creation of families and not aiding them. In trying to help young mother's get a head start the government programs are actually keeping them in poverty, both financially and spiritually, because it's hindering their pursuit of a better life. The life the government provides is "good enough", certainly too good to try a something different.

So government involvement in schools is no different. Government officials try, they try so hard to close the gap between the rich and the poor. They try to create programs that "will leave no child behind", yet instead of raising the bar across the board the programs have widen the gap and in the worst case scenarios they have lower the performance across the board. After a decade of NCLB, we still have failing schools, we still have children who do not meet standards, we have disgruntled (and rightly so) teachers and we have frustrated parents.

Government claims to have the child's best interest in mind. I don't believe it. I think even the best intentioned politician ultimately has his/her career front and center. They will try to do right by the children, but only so long as it doesn't hurt their career. They talk themselves into believing that if they lose their seat, they won't be able to help out during the next term. They remain silent because they want their voice to be heard. Unions claim to have the best interest of children in mind, and perhaps they come a little closer to the mark. They after all are the voice of the dedicated teachers that struggle to teach the lowliest among us. However, the teachers are not our children. When unions rail against change, any change because it could hindered the teacher's employment or benefits no matter how worthy the cause, it is still not a concern for our children. Teacher's themselves are stuck between a rock and a hard place. They are in the front line dealing with the children they serve, the obnoxious parents, the overbearing administration. They are in constant flux year in and year out regarding their employment, all the while concerned with the livelihood of their own families. Really it's so much that any true concern for the children is trumped by all the other things going on.

Which brings me to the parent. We are the only ones who can truly have our own children's best interest in mind, but the government can't trust us. I can't say that I can really blame them. I too often see why they feel a need to step in. I have often tried to step in myself and "help" a parent who I think is struggling. My eagerness to help is rarely met with enthusiasm or gratitude. Usually my help is met with resistance, indignation and hostility. I however, unlike the government am not offering money or free programs, so my help is usually rejected. So what is a government to do when dealing with such vast difference in attitudes, socioeconomic levels, religious differences, cultural differences etc? Well I think they can fearlessly open the gates of choice. I know that this is quite controversial. Charter schools, vouchers, online learning, private schools, public schools, special programs, continuation school, evening classes, why not just offer it all up as the ultimate sacrifice on the altar of our children. Really give parents a choice and a voice on how their children will be educated. Give parents back the responsibility of raising their kids. What will happen to schools and teachers if the flood gates of education are opened wide? You know, my concern is MY children and THEIR future. I'm sure that well educated teachers will figure it out, isn't that ultimately when a good education is useful?

Stay tuned for the next post: Parent Reform

School Reform

My head is spinning. I've been on Twitter. You should see the mess over there regarding school reform. It's ugly. School reformers are accusing unions who are accusing politicians who are attacking teachers who are pointing fingers at reformers! Geez. I just keep wondering where all the parents are in this discourse. Sure there is a group that has the name parent in it, but I doubt that any parents in that group have kids in failing schools because they are talking about all the same things that have absolutely nothing to do with kids or the REAL problem with education. The fact is no one can even agree to what the real problem is. Well lucky for all of you, I've given this a lot of thought. I will now share my wisdom with you all and tell you what the REAL problem in public education is. Ready?

It's the MONEY. It's not even a lack of money, it's just the money. First thing relating to money is the huge gap in education among the affluent and the poor. Sure, the affluent have money and the poor don't. True, but public education is for EVERYONE regardless of income, social status, geographical location. In essence a child in Holmby Hills should be getting the same education as the children of Appalachia. We know this is not happening because schools receive funding from many different sources including federal, state and city and from home owner taxes. So the school in cities that are dying like Cleveland,Ohio are not going to have the same kind of money as the school in Lake Oswego, Oregon. That is just one money factor, but it's a big one.

So I ask myself, instead of continuing to aggravate the problem, why isn't the federal government the sole funding agency for schools across America? If the federal government gave $10,000 per child to very household in America for the sole purposes of educating the child in that household it would alleviate all this finger pointing and constant bickering. Of course the federal government won't do that, because it does not trust parents to raise their own children. It has no problem trusting our children to corporations (Hi Microsoft!) or to experts (Greetings, Mr. Duncan), but to parents, NEVER!

I'm actually liking this idea the more I write about it. (Warning this post is taking of on it's own course...next stop...common sense!) I'm going to let this sink in for a bit before I write more. I promise that come next month, I'll be writing about a lot more fun stuff like curriculum and projects and stories. Until then bear with me while I get my thoughts in order.

Faith

Most things in life require a leap of faith. Life is fluid and ever evolving. You could know a person for years and at some point you choose to keep things the way they are or take a leap of faith and marry them. I know couples that took things slow and steady. Couples who got to know each other over years and still their relationship ended in divorce. I know couples that took a leap of faith just months after meeting and they are still together, going strong. I also know couples where the opposite is true. People will say it didn't work out because they jumped into their relationship or because they married once the relationship was stagnant, they had know each other for too a long time. Truth is, we never know how things will work out or why some things do work out and other don't. In the end, you either take a leap of faith or you stop growing.

Home schooling requires a huge leap of faith. I love teaching my kids, but as much as I love it, I struggle with having faith that I am teaching them what I'm supposed to be teaching and that they will learn what they need to learn. Anyone else on this boat with me? I struggle so much with it, that it has become the theme for this year. Last year my fear of not teaching the kids what they needed was so vast that I enrolled them in a virtual school. I have no complaints about the school, except that I am so used to having my own curriculum that I felt their was stifling. What I learned was that some things presented were completely new to my kids. I had never covered it. Most things however were will below their cognitive level. I'm not saying that my kids are particularly intelligent, but I do think that by allowing them to be curious, by giving them one on two attention, by linking learning to real life experiences they really get to know their stuff. You would think that after that experience I would have tremendous faith that this road I've chosen for my kids is the right one, but you'd be wrong to think so.

"Doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith is his twin brother."
~Khalil Gibran~

I often write about trusting the process and I think it's time to start following my own advice, but how? That is always the tricky part isn't is? Well I have a plan. It's simple, it's straightforward and it will work. I've always worked with a foggy plan. Since it was not my intent to actually home school my plan was lacking. It was written down, but it never felt serious. It never felt like I was a teacher. Things changed a bit last year when I opened the preschool. For the preschool I have a definite plan. I have a rhythm, a mission statement, policies, a degree and I'm licensed. I'm a real teacher for young ones. This year I'm also a real teacher for my kids. The e-course I'm taking through Fairy Dust Teaching is awesome. It's taking me step by step in organizing my plan. It takes into a account state standards (which I has never done before), there is a theme, there is the putting all together in a notebook. It's perfect. There are however a few more things I need to work on to make this year successful.

I need to practice having faith. I have deep faith in God, but sometimes it's difficult to let go of the reins, even when I don't know where I'm going. This year the route (plan) is clear and I'm handing the reins over to a greater power. I'll do the work, but I'm not going to be responsible for the outcome. I promise to be present, to work hard and do my best. My kids need to be present and do their part. I have to have faith that the results will follow. I need to trust the process and that my kids, whether home schooled or in a brick and mortar setting will get the knowledge they need to be successful. In case I forget I posted the following quote on the front of my curriculum notebook:

"There is nothing that wastes the body like worry, and one who has any faith in God should be ashamed to worry about anything whatsoever."
~Mahatma Gandhi~

Space: A New Frontier

This week the theme was Space. What fun! The kids made this which is proudly hanging in the classroom:
This was a great project all around. The "Sun" is a wreath purchased at Dollar Tree. It was painted with yellow tempera paint and sprinkled with glitter. Lots of glitter! The planets are different sized styrofoam balls also from Dollar Tree. I purchased them last year, knowing I wanted the kids to do a mobile at some point. Much to Isabela's relief the day finally came when I said, "Yes you can open the bags with the styrofoam balls!" The kids tore different colored tissue paper. They sorted (a math skill) the planets according to size. Mercury is small, Pluto is tiny, Jupiter is huge. Then they decided what colors to do each planet. Earth is blue and green. Mars is red and Uranus is green due to the gases, Neptune is blue because the gases are different. (That's what I was told by the kids. They used problem-solving skills to come to an agreement, reasoning and deductions to come to their conclusions) The kids used big brushes to spread thinned glue onto the balls and covered them in tissue. (motor skill) We had to let the sun and the planets dry for a couple of days. (Patience) Then we used a screwdriver to put screws into each planet and someone suggested adding glue around the edge of the screw to make it extra secure. (Fine motor skill) Finally with some help from me, the silk thread was tied to each planet and I hung them from the sun as the kids called out the order. We even had a discussion about whether or not Pluto is in fact a planet. So much to learn from such a fun, simple project.

The kids also painted these:

The one above is our Solar System painted by I who is 7 years old.


This one is a star going Supernova painted by L who is 8 years old.


This one is a galaxy painted by D who is 7 years old.

The fun, exploring and learning didn't just happen while doing arts and crafts. I managed to save some pretty big boxes and the kids made a really cool spaceship! Unfortunately it was destroyed while re-entering the atmosphere. Who knew it would be raining in Oregon in July? Finally our hula hoops served as costumes. Each child pretended to be Saturn and see how fast they could make their ring spin. According to the kids, the rings around Uranus must spin faster than the rings around Saturn because it's easier to spin the hoops vertically around your arm than it is to spin horizontally around your waist. We also check out this site.

I love watching the kids get excited and love that they are eager to learn. I can't wait until next week. Stay tuned for Fairy Tales old and new.

This House is a Mess!

My goodness it's not easy keeping a house neat and tidy when you have kids. Those toddler years especially are challenging. There is no secret to a clean house. There is no getting around it, at some point you just have to clean. Don't despair however, there are a few tricks that seasoned mothers like myself have learned.

• SIMPLIFY!

Have I said this before? The less you have the easier it is to keep clean. I remember living in a roomy three bedroom apartment that became a crowded three bedroom apartment a few month before the birth of my son. Babies come with a lot of stuff. My suggestion to mothers that are expecting is not to open and unpack everything. Some things you may find you don't like or don't need. You may be able to return them and get more diapers. Secondly, don't buy all the hype. A mobile is really unnecessary and so temporary. You are going to have to take it down the minute your child can pull himself up. Most of the time he is in his crib, he'll be sleeping (hopefully), so it's not going to stimulate him visually. There is plenty to stimulate him visually in his natural world. Be choosy about the things you have in your home. If it's not useful or beautiful (in a way that makes you feel good and doesn't cause stress) , you probably shouldn't keep it.

• Start with a clean home.

If your home has been neglected, you need to clean it, there is just no getting around it. Buckle down and clean. My suggestion would be to clean, but not organize at this point. It'll become overwhelming and it won't get done. Get yourself a box and put everything that is not in it's place in the box. Get everything off your floors and mop or vacuum them. Get everything off your counters and shelves and dust and wipe. Once your home is clean, floors mopped, dust bunnies cleaned up, everything dusted, then you can slowly begin to organize.

• 30 minutes a day

When you get up in the morning take 15 minutes to clean up, even is it means getting up 15 minutes earlier. Make your bed. After you use the bathroom and brush your teeth, take a wipe (I love Kirkland baby wipe from Costco, but the Clorox wipes work well too) and wipe down all the surfaces of your bathroom. After breakfast, put everything in the dishwasher and wipe down all the counters, sweep the floor. Before going to bed, take 15 minutes to put things back where they belong, including your clothes and shoes. Vacuum your carpets. Have your kids get into this habit by helping them put their toys "to sleep" before they get ready for bed.

• Once a week

Once a week clean your bathroom, kitchen and dust the furniture. Instill your child's help if he is old enough (even a toddler can help wipe down surfaces, especially if you are using baby wipes).

• Let it go

Understand that there are times when cleaning has to take a back seat. If you or your child are sick. If you just had a baby. If it's the middle of the day and your kids are making forts with the couch cushions. In times like these, you have to put cleaning aside and sometimes even accept the help of family and friends. I know your sister doesn't fold towels the way you like or that your friend doesn't know where your pots and pans go, it's okay.

Life is sometimes a mess and then you feel better and you clean it up and you go on your way. Your house will be like that too.

Happy Cleaning,

Alida


p.s. If you need some serious help, check out The Fly Lady.

A Very Special E-Course

I am just in awe of the connections that I've made through the internet. No, Sergio and I did not meet in a chat room. Do those even exist anymore? I have found a wonderful network of like minded women and men, teachers, mentors and new friends. I'm excited to have opportunities to learn new things in my own time and in the comfort of home. I've taken a few e-courses and participate in a several tele-classes. I have not been disappointed. I have also never been as excited about an e-course as I am about this one. I use Fairy Dust Teaching as a resource for both the preschool program and my home school enrichment programs. Sally does such a great job of illustrating the concepts or projects step by step. She's creative and her enthusiasm for teaching comes across in each post.

The Dash of Wonder E-course begins on July 10, 2011. I just can't wait!

The Good News

I write about what's "wrong" with our public education system. The good news is that there are a lot of individuals and organizations that are doing things right. For me, doing things right means simply offering a choice, a differing opinion, someone who is giving us something to think about. In the circles that I gravitate to, there is talk about a paradigm shift. I see it. I feel it.

This new paradigm is about creativity. It's about doing things in a new way. It's about fearless teaching and learning. It's about trusting the process and understanding that learning is continual, though not necessarily linear. It's about sharing what you know even if you don't have a degree. It's about creating something meaningful and knowing that a hand knitted baby beanie made of the softest lambs wool is as beautiful and as beneficial as creating new fuel technology. It's about understanding the value of fairy tales and myths and really believing that the fastest doesn't always win the race. It's knowing that knowledge comes in many forms and that the most important thing in life is to be ever curious.

This weekend I leave you with a list of links to sites that are prompting these values. I hope you take the time to look them over and share you thoughts.

• The Alliance for Childhood
• The Parenting Passageway
• The National Institute for Play
• Fairy Dust Teaching
• Playscapes
• Lynn Jericho

There are many, many more, but these will give you some good reading material for the weekend.

I would like to wish all the dads out there a very happy Father's Day. You are as varied as your children. Some of you work day in and day out to provide for your families. Some of you struggle because you lacked an appropriate role model. Some of you are stay at home dads trying to find your place in a world dominated by women. Know that all of you are loved by your children and appreciated by those whose life you make a little sweeter. Thanks and enjoy.

Alida

Sit Down, Shut Up and Learn

It's been a rough couple of weeks for me. I've been struggling to keep up my spirits through the spring that feels more like a very wet California winter. I'm struggling to follow through on getting the word out for our summer program. I'm struggling to finish up the kids school year.

I'm also struggling to maintain a positive attitude in light of the course that public education seems to be taking. I've been struggling with this for a long time. I try to stay informed with what's going on in public education because I feel that of all the government programs, this is the most important. I go from being depressed about what I read to being horrified by it. I recently wrote a long post in opposition of making school days longer. While I stand by what I wrote I am willing to concede that longer school days may be advantageous to a small percentage of students. Just as I was coming to this conclusion, just as I was thinking that perhaps I'm viewing public school programs from my one-sided perspective, I received this gem in my inbox. I was livid! I decided not to write about this program right away. I decided to let in sink in, to view it from a different perspective. In the meantime I checked into the credentials of Health and Human Secretary Kathleen Sebelius. and her Deputy Assistant, Joan Lombardi, Ph.D. Ms. Sebelius holds a Master of Public Administration degree from the University of Kansas and a Bachelor of Arts degree from Trinity Washington University.* Dr. Lombardi holds a Masters in Early Childhood Education from Boston College and a Ph.D. in Human Development Education from the University of Maryland. Dr. Lombardi is the author of Time to Care: Redesigning Child Care to Promote Education, Support and Build Communities, and co-editor of A Beacon of Hope: The Promise of Early Head Start for American’s Youngest Children.* These certainly are impressive credentials.

What is not at all impressive is this new government program. According to the HHS Secretary herself, this $500 million early learning initiative is designed to deal with children from birth onward to prevent such problems as 5-year olds who "can't sit still" in a kindergarten classroom. When did we start to consider this a problem? Five year olds are not supposed to sit still. It's reading about programs like these that want to make my head explode.


Five year olds are active curious children. Spending $500 million to teach them to sit still is like spending money to teach a river to flow upstream. We may accomplish it, but at what cost and for what purpose? It seems that there is a huge disconnect between achievement and learning in our public schools. Our students can achieve any task we set ourselves to enforce, that does not mean that they are learning anything useful from it. I use the word "enforce" because I cannot forsee "teaching" a skill such as sitting still. This is not something that is taught, it is enforced. Enforcing rules is not a bad thing per se, if it sets the child on the path to success. Here we thrive on following daily rhythms with the sole purpose of instilling healthy habits in the youngest children. These routines or rules must always meet the child where he is developmentally. A five year old is just mastering his physical abilities. He thrives on "see what I can do." The child has an intrinsic need to be physically active, to be physically challenged.

The article goes on to equate "sitting still" with health:

“You really need to look at the range of issues, because if a 5-year-old can’t sit still, it is unlikely that they can do well in a kindergarten class, and it has to be the whole range of issues that go into healthy child development,” Sebelius said during a telephone news conference on Wednesday to announce the Race to the Top Early Learning Challenge.

While I agree that there are a whole range of issues that go into child development, I don't see how spending millions to promote "sitting still" contributes to any of them. I want you to forget for a moment about these women's credentials and I want you to think about what you have just read. Does that sit well with you? Does it make sense to you? What does your gut tell you about this program?

There seems to be something sinister here, when our government can misspend this kind of money but 47 teachers in our Salem-Keizer school district are getting pink slips which will leave already overcrowded schools with even more overcrowding. It seems that these programs are missing the mark. Our goal should not be to prepare children for school, our goal should be to prepare children for the next stage in development and subsequently for life. We are so concerned whether or not children are prepared to enter school that we seem to forget that school is a place of learning as much as home is. What a child does not know, he can learn. He can learn it in kinder or in first or in second grade. There is no tragedy here, except for our expectations. My own children differ greatly in the progression of their physical and cognitive development. My son starting reading at 4 years of age with little help from me. He was 8 years old before he finally conquered the monkey bars at the park. My daughter is an artist and a bit of a daredevil (sometimes) but struggled to read. At age seven, she still reads slowly and needs help to sound out words. I still have to hold a space for her when she reads. These children are being raised by the same two people in one environment and yet they differ greatly. How can any agency expect to have a group of 5 year old children that are developmentally exact? Instead this money should be spent on training teachers to meet children where they are developmentally and to lead them to thrive. Now the goal should not be to level the playing field because that would mean that children that are developmentally advance would not be encouraged to continue to thrive until others caught up. Isn't that in a nutshell our public education system? No child left behind? Actually all children are getting left behind.

Frankly I'm getting a little fed up with agencies and many school districts blaming parents for all of their children's short-comings. It creates a toxic culture and it is that culture that our children are supposed to learn and thrive in. I agree that parents are their child's first teacher, but child develop differently all across the spectrum. Most children enter school at age 5 or 6 and to the dismay of the district they are already "behind." Some can't count to 100, some can't add, some can't sit still. Of course the parents are to blame, what have they been teaching their kids anyway? While in school our children are offered the lowest quality food imaginable (that is slow changing, thank goodness). Physical education classes are being cut as is recess because the kids are lagging "behind" academically, then when there is a rise in obesity or childhood diabetes, it is again the parents who are blamed. It's all those McDonald runs for dinner or video games the kids play. Seriously? The school districts play no part in our children's failures?

I believe they do play a huge role in our children's failure to learn, to thrive, to be healthy. I believe it is programs like these that send a message that at five years of age, a child who cannot sit still will FAIL! While I find it a ridiculous suggestion, it will be eaten up hook, line and sinker by most people who do not stop to think that perhaps all these agencies have everything on the line except our children's health and welfare. I give thanks everyday that we have made the sometimes difficult choice of keeping our children out of this system. I still struggle with the thought of some many people not having any choice at all. I struggle with that fact that these highly educated individuals running all these government agencies seem to have no concept of how a child develops or what is appropriate for them during their development.

The good news is I do see change in the horizon. That will be the subject of an upcoming post. I would love to hear your thoughts about this program. Leave a comment or send me an e-mail.

Peace,

Alida

Easter and New Beginnings

This week we are celebrating Easter. Religious celebrations have lost their soul in many public institutions. Schools are off for Spring Break and they no longer even fall within Easter Week. Easter is all about chocolate bunnies and chocolate eggs. Oh alright, I'm the one obsessed with chocolate but you get where I'm going. It can be tricky to do a curriculum around Easter even if all the students are Christian because there are so many different denominations and while the story is the same, the meaning varies from person to person. I remember being quite young and already being immersed in Catholic doctrine. Christ died for our sins. As a teacher, I don't feel comfortable discussing this particular topic with children that come from so many varied backgrounds. I tend to get very philosophical about Christ's death and about "our sins". I do however want to remain true to the celebration and meet children where they are.

We celebrate Easter and we talk about rebirth and new life. When the children bring up that Jesus died and resurrected, I let them do the talking. It's wonderful to listen to them make sense of such complex concepts. Children sometimes have an innate understanding of things. I do always include some Bible stories from a book called Bible Stories for Children. It was given to my husband when he was a boy by his grandfather. It's a cherished book around here. We talk about what makes the book so special and how the memory of those who have died lives within us.

Of course we will have chocolate bunnies and Easter baskets. The kids are growing real grass for their baskets. There will be an Easter Egg hunt and we will be baking Madeline's, a favorite cookie any time of the year. We will hold this time of renewal and new life sacred. Starting on Easter Sunday we will be closed for two weeks. It will be a time of renewal for me. It will be a time to purchase and get all the things we need for the wonderful summer program.

I do hope you all enjoy your Easter Sunday. I hope the sun shines upon your celebration. I hope you take the time to renew yourself and your goals.

Peace,

Alida

Picky Eaters

I know this doesn't pertain to most parents, (I'm being sarcastic) but today I'm going to address the segment of the picky eater population. I'm an expert in this field. I was a picky eater, I have a son who is a picky eater. There are three secrets to get your picky eater to eat healthy.

1. Have only healthy food at home.

2. Model eating healthy food

3. Relax, your child won't starve.

Do those three things seem drastic? Be honest. If they seem drastic it's time to take a step away from worrying about your child and look at your lifestyle. Why is there junk food in your house? Is it something you buy because you are in the habit of buying the same thing without thinking about it? Is it a matter of finances? Junk food is cheaper at the moment, but so much more expensive in the long run. Do you find buying things like pizza, boxed Macaroni and Cheese, hot dogs and ice cream because it will ensure that your child will eat?

As parents we sometimes have to make difficult choices for the good of our kids, but even more importantly we should be making good choices for our benefit. We need to be healthy in order to be the best parents we can be. Wouldn't it be wonderful to wake up full of energy and be able to fully engage with our children throughout the day? Wouldn't it be wonderful to not worry about EATING but instead concern ourselves with nutrition? Are you ready? It's not going to be easy but it's going to be so worth it for you and your children!

• 1. Sit down and write down your regular shopping list. Now look at it! What is it that you've written down? Ready to eat, microwavable items or whole, colorful, fresh foods?
  

If you wrote down mostly whole, colorful, fresh foods you probably don't need to read the rest of this. If you wrote down mostly ready to eat stuff, go on to number 2.

• 2. Rewrite your list and this time include mostly whole, colorful, fresh food. The best place is your local farmer's market, but if you are busy, don't put off buying healthy food until you can make a special trip to the farmer's market. You can buy fruits and veggies at the grocery store.

So now your child is whining because he's hungry and there are no chips, now what? The best way to deal with any whining is to acknowledge the issue, offer ONE alternative and then tell the child you will ignore any more whining, because there is nothing else you can do. This is not easy! As parents we are the problem solvers, but it's a good thing to let kids realize that you cannot solve every problem. You can follow this model:

Child: "I waaant a cookie! I'm huuuunnnngry."
Parent: "Oh honey, we are all out of cookies. You can have some sliced apples with peanut butter. That's yummy."
Child: "NOOOO!"
Parent: "Okay, sweetie. Now no more whining. I have nothing else for you to eat at the moment."
Child: "But I'm hungry."
Parent: (sings softly while ignoring the whining.)

Understand that many food issues are easier to handle if you establish set eating times and you model healthy eating yourself. Also remember that very young children do not get choices when it comes to food. You do not ask a child what he wants for breakfast, lunch, snack or dinner! You are the parent you decide. As your children get older, they may choose a snack or in my case, because I am not an early riser on the weekends, my kids can choose and get their own breakfast on Saturday morning. They know they have several things to choose from such as, yogurt, granola, any fruit available, toast with peanut butter and honey, milk or juice. I'm still not comfortable with them using the stove without supervision, so no pancakes or omelets.

• 3. Model healthy eating. Have set eating times and make sure you give yourself time to prepare the meal. Have your child help you. Sit down and enjoy. Serve cut up oranges or strawberries for dessert. Introduce prunes...which really are as sweet as any candy. Talk about all the energy and nutrients this wonderful meal will provide for your body to grow strong and healthy. You may not think they don't understand or care, but you would be wrong. Kids are born to thrive and unless taught otherwise, it's ingrained in them to want to thrive.

• 4. Relax. Your child will not starve. If you particularly worry, like I do, give them a multi-vitamin. While not a substitute for a good meal, it's helps keep parental worries at bay. Know that not unlike adults, your kids will go through phases. Sometimes my son cannot get enough strawberries. I can seriously but five pounds and they'll be gone by dinner. Of course we all pitch in and eat, but he devours them. Then all of sudden, he doesn't like the way the seeds feel on his tongue and he won't even look at them! That's fine, we always have bananas, or mangoes, or apples, or oranges.

• 5. Be patient. Children have way more taste buds than adults do. So don't fret if your child can't stand the taste of tuna or celery. There are a lot of healthy options. Remember that many children are sensitive to textures. Introduce new foods slowly, without hoopla. Just serve it in pretty and appetizing way. Bring out the pretty platters and dishes. Let your child see you taste it. Moan and say, "Oooooh, that's yummy."
  

What about treats? You got to have treats! If you must have sugary foods (and I must). Make them yourself whenever possible. This creates wonderful scenarios. First, baking a batch of chocolate chip cookies with your child creates wonderful memories. It teaches your child skills, such as reading, chemistry and math. (can you say FRACTIONS?) It also helps the child connect with the food he eats. You should be conscious of how much work it takes to make something delicious. Children gain a great feeling of satisfaction. "Look what I made." Greater still, it takes work to bake cookies, so you are not going to do it everyday. This is a great way to keep the less healthy choices at bay. Around here we make a big batch of dough and then I freeze it. Sometimes for a whole week we'll have one cookie after dinner. I scoop out four tablespoons and bake those. When the kids ask for more (which of course they always do.) I can honestly say, I'm sorry we are all out of cookies.

I hear you screaming at me through the screen, "What about time? I don't have time to prepare fresh food!" I hear you. I work and home school and there is nothing worse than realizing it's 6:00 PM and everything is frozen. It's not easy, but planning is essential. Once you get in the habit of planning, it gets easier and easier. Meals don't have to be fancy, in fact, the best meals are often simple. If you have a menu, you can bring out your frozen stuff and put it in the fridge two day ahead of schedule. So if you are have steak tacos on Thursday, bring the steak down into the fridge on Tuesday. Prepare a pasta dish ahead of time and freeze it. Then just stick it in the oven and serve. Bean soups are wonderful, especially if you add lots of veggies and it freezes well too. Just heat and serve with a nice hearty slice of 10-grain bread and it's a complete meal.

Conscious living and conscious parenting takes time, but it is so worth it. This is the only shot you get at making your life meaningful. Shouldn't you take the time today to make it so? Put away all your excuses and really look at your diet and that of your child. It reflects so much more than food choices. Let me know if you need some healthy ideas for snacks and meals. I'd be happy to share them!

Life Spiraling Up

It's been a while since I looked at Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. I love the model above because it shows traveling up the hierarchy in a spiral. So many things throughout our lives move in spirals. We know this at some unconscious level because so often we speak of some poor soul on a downward spiral. When we are introduced to an overnight success he or she was usually on an upward spiral. Rarely do people shoot straight up to the top. It's a succession of steps. One after another, after another. More on spirals in another post, but now back to the Hierarchy.

Every new parent should post this image on their refrigerator once they have a child. On the bottom we find what are often referred to as basic needs. Until these needs are met we cannot move on to the next step. Infants and children are completely dependent on their parents to fulfill the first levels, these basic needs.

I cannot emphasis enough how important it is for parents to meet these basic needs. Children cry because they need something. It may be food or they may need a diaper change. They may need to be held for comfort and security. Whatever the reason may be, you must meet the child where they are and give them what is needed for them to continue to develop. When a child cries and we pick them up gently and coo or whisper to them, they learn that the world is a safe place, that they live in a world that will provide them the resources they need to thrive. They learn that they have a voice, that they have some control over their very basic physical needs. They learn to feel secure in this new huge and overwhelming world that they have been born into, this goes on to develop a strong self-esteem. This will not spoil the child. Many of us come from a background where we withhold things in order to raise strong, self-sufficient children, but nothing could be further from the truth when speaking of about infants or young children. Meeting the child's needs develops a healthy attachment which is imperative to continued healthy development.

What happens to a child who needs are not met? In a nutshell children will have insecure attachment issues and disorders. Insecure attachments can begin as early as in-utero. When a mother neglects her well-being, she is also neglects the well-being of her unborn child. In the primal stages of development the fetus is already preparing itself for a life of deprivation and scarcity. Because the fetus is using the scares resources it's getting for it's mere survival, development is hampered. The child may be born with underdeveloped physical traits, but also and just as important, the child is lacking in his emotional development. Once the child is born, if neglect continues or begins, all areas of development will continue to be hampered. A child who is not fed when hungry will eventually stop crying out for food because it instinctively understands that it's hostile environment will not provide for his needs. A child who is not held will go from extreme bouts of self-hate to clinging with almost complete strangers. Neither of these two extremes is emotionally healthy. It's almost as if the child goes down the hierarchy spiral instead of progressing up the spiral.

Hold your child, feed him, comfort him without fear of spoiling him. A well nurtured child is an adult full of confidence, zest and with a tremendous love of life.

I Don't Pay for Them to Play!

Play to an adult may seem or feel frivolous or irresponsible. It may feel like a major waste of time. As adults we rarely play...even when we do. Many spend hundreds of dollars on gym membership, but surely this is not play, after all who really looks forward to the gym. ("Not I," said Alida) Some adults are even on teams playing baseball or softball or basketball, but surely this is not play! It's exercise, it's blowing off steam, it's staying fit but rarely do we describe it as play. Some adult even "play" video games, but they do it to relax, to disconnect after a hard day at work. This surely cannot be play. It has a purpose, a reason, we engage in these activities because they are good for us. We rarely stop to take note of ALL the benefits of play, especially for the youngest among us.

Sometimes when parents come to see the preschool they tell me about other places that they have visited. I have heard about babysitters that sit in front of the T.V. all day while the kids play all day long. My mind is simple. It thinks, T.V. all day - bad. Children playing all day - good! I've heard parents tell me they want to know what kind of academics are offered, because they are not paying to have their children play all day. My mind thinks, academics - good. Children play all day - good! I can totally understand wanting to reap some very specific benefits from any kind of learning environment, especially if you are paying top dollar. While we do offer an academic program, we do it through play. Play after all is the work of the child.

On Tuesday, March 29, 2011 I am speaking at the Salem Central Library on this very topic. Joining me is Pam Houghton from Mrs. Houghton's Gingersnaps Child Care and Playhouse. We will be discussing the value of play in child development. We will be detailing what exactly your child is learning while he plays. We will be listing what the best toys are and I guarantee you'll be surprised! We will also be leading a workshop where you will be making a toy to take home for your child.

If you are a parent looking for quality care or a child care provider wondering how to explain the importance of play to parents of children in your care, I urge you to join us. I will be revisiting the subject of play many, many times on this blog. For now, I will leave the details of our workshop and I headed off to "play" with the kids.

Ivy League-West and Mrs. Houghton’s Gingersnaps present:

The Value of Play in Children Development

Join Alida Chacon and Pam Houghton as they share their views on the value of play, which toys elicit imaginative play and what ways you can engage your child through play.

Come share your thoughts, questions and ideas. Make a toy to take home for your child to play with the next day.

Salem Central Public Library

585 Liberty St. Salem Oregon

Plaza Room

March 29, 2011

7:15 pm to 8:45 pm

Cost: $5.00 in advance $7.00 at the door

Seating is limited. Call to reserve your seat today.

503.510.1136

Ivy League-West Summer Enrichment

Ivy League-West Summer Enrichment Programs 2011

Weekly Schedule

June 27 – July 1 Hello Summer!

Classic Summer Activities

Playing outdoors, jumping rope, hopscotch, classic games, fort building, making popsicles, making makeshift tents, relaxing on hammocks, swinging, grill lunch, tending the garden.

July 5 – July 8 Let Freedom Ring!

Step back into Colonial Times

Card wool, make yarn. Learn to knit and embroider, chop firewood, whittle sticks, bake bread, make dolls, create board games.

July 11 – July 15 Soar into Space!

Explore Space Travel

Learn about planets, planetoids, moons and everything else found in space. Make astronaut suits and spaceships. Recreate moon landing. Discover a new planet. Make friends with its strange inhabitants.

July 18 – July 22 Knights and Princesses!

Read fairy tales from every corner of the earth.

Write original plays based on classic and exotic fairy tales. Build and paint sets and stages. Make costumes. Learn about courage, strength and facing your fears. Maybe even slay a dragon. (Or befriend one.)

July 25 – July 29 Water World!

Water is most valuable natural resource.

Play in and explore the many uses of water. Learn how to conserve and why it’s important. From watercolors to water energy sources, water is life.

August 1 – August 5 CLOSED!

No programs this week.

August 8 – August 12 Kitchen Science!

There is more going on than you can taste.

What chemical reactions are happening while cooking? Can you change the change the composition of food by cooking? Learn about good nutrition while exploring the mysteries of science in cooking.

August 15 – August 19 We Dig Fossils!

Is there a dinosaur in your backyard?

Explore fossils and where they are found. Make casts and impressions. Dissect owl pellets. Learn how fossils are made and what they tell us once found.

August 22 – August 26 Show Me The Money!

Your future is now.

Learn how to make a spending plan so you can have money for fun and save for college. Learn about savings accounts and how interest works. Learn about ways you can make money.

August 29 – September 2 Beyond Playdough!

What is a polymer?

Learn about the amazing properties of polymers. Make various polymers. Make an end of summer sculpture as a take home memento.

Call us to register today.

503.510.1136

All this plus two healthy snacks and a healthy seasonal lunch for $90.00 a week. There is no registration fee for our Summer Program, however early registration and payment is highly recommended as spaces are limited!