As you know, we feel very strongly about the importance of play in a child's healthy development. It may come as no surprise that because this is Oregon, we play outside every time it's dry and sometimes even if it's raining. Right now we've been enjoying some pretty awesome weather and the kids have been outside most afternoons. We practice our writing skills using sidewalk chalk. We practice our math skills by chanting the multiplication tables or addition facts while tossing a catching beanbags. We skip rope, play jacks, play with a hula hoop.
Of course the kids are awesome about coming up with all types of creative play. They've made their own obstacle courses. The made an exploding volcano with mud (and vinegar and baking soda) and many of the plastic dinosaurs perished during the eruption. The play structure has been a fort, a look out post and a ship.
Yesterday, they took the jump rope and would let down the slide. One child would grab hold and two children up on the structure would pull and pull until they managed to pull the child on the bottom of the slide all the way up. They then took turns and played this way for over an hour!
At first glance, I almost put a stop to it. In my mind I could just picture all the dangers and accidents waiting to happen. After all, we are talking about school aged kids, a slide and a rope. It's a recipe for disaster. The rope burns, accidental strangulation, accidental falls from the top of the structure were all vivid in my mind's eye. Did I mention the rope has wooden handles and each time they flung it down the slide it came oh so close to taking out an eye? All these worst case scenarios where playing out in my head. Then I realized I WAS RIGHT THERE! The most serious thing that could happen was the someone would get a rope burn or get hit with the wooden handle. I stopped them for just a second and point out these dangers, reminded them to be safe and let them continue playing. I'm so glad I did.
Later they each talked about who the strongest kid was, who was the fastest coming up the slide, who did get a little rope burn and how they knew after that to let go immediately. They spoke excitedly and quickly among themselves, sharing information, deciding that that was an awesome game, making plans for improvements and they unanimously decided they would play again today.
I learned that danger lurks around every corner. I can make that the focus and try to protect kids from every possible scenario and kick myself when I miss something and they get hurt. I can choose to focus on the learning, point out the dangers, remind them to be safe and let them figure it out. I think the latter makes for better adults in the long run.
Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Grace
I was speaking to a young lady about all the wonderful things that are going on at Ivy League-West this summer. She was very excited and told me how her sister was majoring in child development. She went on to tell me how much she's learned from her sister and how now she sees parents at the grocery store and just wants to walk up to them and tell them how wrong what they are doing is.
I smiled. I remembered being 18 and working at a preschool with women in their 60's who still, to my dismay, referred to themselves as baby-sitters. At staff meetings I raised my hands eagerly with bright eyes to share all the things I had learned that they could not possibly know. Did I mention they were in their 60's? I blushed. I remembered being 21 and doling out parenting advice like it was going out of style to parents who had not requested it. I sighed. I remembered seeing, perhaps the very parents she's referring to and feeling like handing them my business card and telling them that parenting doesn't have to be so darn difficult.
I looked at this young girl and confronted what I do every day. How can I correct her misconception without stifling her enthusiasm. This is what I told her;
"Well yes, I've been there too. I see parents struggling at best, being completely inappropriate at worst and I too sometimes want to speak up, but then I remind myself that I'm looking through a very tiny window in what is a small part of the day and I don't know what this day has been like for that parent. They could have just received some terrible news or they could be dealing with an illness or they could be doing what's best at that moment for their child who may have a need that I am not aware of. There have been moments where, even with all my training and knowledge, I've snapped at my kids in public. These are moment where I am not at my best. They don't happen often, but if you happened to see me at that moment, you would judge that I was not a good mother, and I am a good mother."
She asked me if I had ever said anything to a parent.
"Yes, actually. If the parent is being inappropriate when they come to pick up their child, I will go over our policies with them and make an appointment to assess if they should continue to bring thier child to me. If it happens while I'm out and about and I don't know the parent, I say a prayer for both the parent and child because it is at moments when we are at our worst that we need God's grace the most. Everyone is doing the best they know how and I just remind myself that that's all anyone can do until they learn to do and be better."
I smiled. I remembered being 18 and working at a preschool with women in their 60's who still, to my dismay, referred to themselves as baby-sitters. At staff meetings I raised my hands eagerly with bright eyes to share all the things I had learned that they could not possibly know. Did I mention they were in their 60's? I blushed. I remembered being 21 and doling out parenting advice like it was going out of style to parents who had not requested it. I sighed. I remembered seeing, perhaps the very parents she's referring to and feeling like handing them my business card and telling them that parenting doesn't have to be so darn difficult.
I looked at this young girl and confronted what I do every day. How can I correct her misconception without stifling her enthusiasm. This is what I told her;
"Well yes, I've been there too. I see parents struggling at best, being completely inappropriate at worst and I too sometimes want to speak up, but then I remind myself that I'm looking through a very tiny window in what is a small part of the day and I don't know what this day has been like for that parent. They could have just received some terrible news or they could be dealing with an illness or they could be doing what's best at that moment for their child who may have a need that I am not aware of. There have been moments where, even with all my training and knowledge, I've snapped at my kids in public. These are moment where I am not at my best. They don't happen often, but if you happened to see me at that moment, you would judge that I was not a good mother, and I am a good mother."
She asked me if I had ever said anything to a parent.
"Yes, actually. If the parent is being inappropriate when they come to pick up their child, I will go over our policies with them and make an appointment to assess if they should continue to bring thier child to me. If it happens while I'm out and about and I don't know the parent, I say a prayer for both the parent and child because it is at moments when we are at our worst that we need God's grace the most. Everyone is doing the best they know how and I just remind myself that that's all anyone can do until they learn to do and be better."
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Friday, February 4, 2011
The Little School That Could
Do people ever say something to you and it sets off a trigger. Your reaction is perhaps overblown, even as you tell yourself that the remark is completely well intentioned. Friends ask me all the time how my "little" school is going and frankly it drives me nuts. I react the exact same way my children do when I call them "little man" or "little lady." I'm Not LITTLE!
I'll admit the school is not big. It's about 900 to 1000 sq feet. The children are not big, although our oldest is twelve and we've got some great things happening with our after school crowd. Mostly we have young kids, 4 to 8 years old. I'll even admit that I am little, although I prefer the word petite to describe my physical attributes. Standing at a mere 5' 1", I am not a big or tall woman. I doubt however that anyone would describe me as small. I don't do small. I do big! I think big! I plan big! Sometimes I even fail in a great big way.
As adults we sometimes think of children as being incomplete beings. Adults tend to focus on everything the child has to learn. After all, they don't know much. They come into this world with only some very basic survival instincts. I like to think about not how much the child needs to learn but how much he has learned. Most kids are walking upright by age one. That's huge! Think about the coordination, the persistence, the muscle that is needed to get yourself up and learn to put one foot in front of the other. It's mastered by age one. Language is another big feat. Children go from goo-goo to go bye-bye to see you tomorrow in a matter of years. These are great big accomplishments that usually occur naturally with some guidance but little interference from adults.
Of course we know that learning never ends. Even when our physical growth has run the gamut, we continue to learn and grow intellectually and spiritually. It's an ongoing process. Learning is always a big deal. Here at Ivy League-West there is always something big going on, even if it not apparent at first. There is the child that sits with a somewhat vacant expression during story time. I'm not sure if the child is even listening or if he is off in a land of his very own. Then one day as I'm reading a chapter of Charlotte's Web during lunch, he cheers because Charlotte has decided to go to the fair with Wilbur. He excitedly informs me that Wilbur is the pig. I can't help but smile. There is the child that points out that I gave her 1/2 a sandwich and that earlier we put 1/2 cup of milk into the muffin batter. These jumps and connections are learning in a big way. There is the really precocious and bright child that is learning to maneuver the social sphere. She is learning that it is not appropriate to argue with the teacher. She is learning to let other children draw their own conclusions. There are children who have learned how to jump rope. Some have learned to bat a ball, some have learned their colors. Some are learning the alphabet and some are learning to write.
Little things are not what we are about. Ivy League-West is a place where big things happen everyday. So if you see me please feel free to ask me how things are going at school, but please don't call it the "little" school.
Thanks,
Alida
I'll admit the school is not big. It's about 900 to 1000 sq feet. The children are not big, although our oldest is twelve and we've got some great things happening with our after school crowd. Mostly we have young kids, 4 to 8 years old. I'll even admit that I am little, although I prefer the word petite to describe my physical attributes. Standing at a mere 5' 1", I am not a big or tall woman. I doubt however that anyone would describe me as small. I don't do small. I do big! I think big! I plan big! Sometimes I even fail in a great big way.
As adults we sometimes think of children as being incomplete beings. Adults tend to focus on everything the child has to learn. After all, they don't know much. They come into this world with only some very basic survival instincts. I like to think about not how much the child needs to learn but how much he has learned. Most kids are walking upright by age one. That's huge! Think about the coordination, the persistence, the muscle that is needed to get yourself up and learn to put one foot in front of the other. It's mastered by age one. Language is another big feat. Children go from goo-goo to go bye-bye to see you tomorrow in a matter of years. These are great big accomplishments that usually occur naturally with some guidance but little interference from adults.
Of course we know that learning never ends. Even when our physical growth has run the gamut, we continue to learn and grow intellectually and spiritually. It's an ongoing process. Learning is always a big deal. Here at Ivy League-West there is always something big going on, even if it not apparent at first. There is the child that sits with a somewhat vacant expression during story time. I'm not sure if the child is even listening or if he is off in a land of his very own. Then one day as I'm reading a chapter of Charlotte's Web during lunch, he cheers because Charlotte has decided to go to the fair with Wilbur. He excitedly informs me that Wilbur is the pig. I can't help but smile. There is the child that points out that I gave her 1/2 a sandwich and that earlier we put 1/2 cup of milk into the muffin batter. These jumps and connections are learning in a big way. There is the really precocious and bright child that is learning to maneuver the social sphere. She is learning that it is not appropriate to argue with the teacher. She is learning to let other children draw their own conclusions. There are children who have learned how to jump rope. Some have learned to bat a ball, some have learned their colors. Some are learning the alphabet and some are learning to write.
Little things are not what we are about. Ivy League-West is a place where big things happen everyday. So if you see me please feel free to ask me how things are going at school, but please don't call it the "little" school.
Thanks,
Alida
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
First Day
I remember being young and having mixed feeling about the first day of school. I was excited to see my friends, but would worry because we didn't keep in touch much throughout the summer. What if they no longer liked me? What if they didn't come back to school? Also there was the whole getting up early thing, which truth be told, I never cared much for.
Today I'll be welcoming little ones to school. For some it'll be their first time away from mom or dad and home. Some will be seasoned pros already. Either way I'm sure there are some misgivings, some butterflies, some "what ifs". It's okay, we are ready to soothe and quiet those doubts and have some fun.
This week the theme is friendship. It amazed me to see how easily my kids make friends. Sometimes though it's a little heart breaking. Luke went up to a 12 year old boys and asked, "Hey, would you like to be my friend?" The boy laughed out loud and then with a smirk replied, "Sure!" He proceeded to run away from Luke. It took Luke a few minutes to realized he had been duped and he ran over to me demanding an explanation. Talk about being put on the spot. We came up with different ways to approach older kids. Instead of asking to be friends, maybe he could ask to join in the game with a very non-chalant, "May I join in?" He wasn't convinced and decided to sit and watch awhile and then asked if we could go home.
Making friends can be easy and comfortable or it can be a tricky road that needs a bit of maneuvering. This week we'll be learning appropriate ways to approach new friends. We'll discuss kindness, one of our rules. We participate in group activities that require cooperation and some negotiation. We'll also learn when to back off a bit and discuss that it's completely appropriate to want some time alone and that it doesn't mean the end of the friendship.
All this plus baking, crafts, art and some gardening. It's going to be a fantastic week.
Today I'll be welcoming little ones to school. For some it'll be their first time away from mom or dad and home. Some will be seasoned pros already. Either way I'm sure there are some misgivings, some butterflies, some "what ifs". It's okay, we are ready to soothe and quiet those doubts and have some fun.
This week the theme is friendship. It amazed me to see how easily my kids make friends. Sometimes though it's a little heart breaking. Luke went up to a 12 year old boys and asked, "Hey, would you like to be my friend?" The boy laughed out loud and then with a smirk replied, "Sure!" He proceeded to run away from Luke. It took Luke a few minutes to realized he had been duped and he ran over to me demanding an explanation. Talk about being put on the spot. We came up with different ways to approach older kids. Instead of asking to be friends, maybe he could ask to join in the game with a very non-chalant, "May I join in?" He wasn't convinced and decided to sit and watch awhile and then asked if we could go home.
Making friends can be easy and comfortable or it can be a tricky road that needs a bit of maneuvering. This week we'll be learning appropriate ways to approach new friends. We'll discuss kindness, one of our rules. We participate in group activities that require cooperation and some negotiation. We'll also learn when to back off a bit and discuss that it's completely appropriate to want some time alone and that it doesn't mean the end of the friendship.
All this plus baking, crafts, art and some gardening. It's going to be a fantastic week.
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Success
How do you measure success? If you measure it by the depth of your friendships, I would have to say that our Opening Celebration was a huge success. If you measure it by the number of blessing that have touched your life, then last night was a huge success. To all the wonderful friends, old and new who came out to support us last night...THANK YOU! I truly enjoyed spending time with each and everyone of you. The night went on a little longer than planned which I hope is an indication that you all had a great time too.
I meant to take and post pictures, but as usual I got so excited and was truly living and enjoying the moment, I completely forgot to take picture to share. Thank you also to everyone who sent blessings, flowers and good wishes. You were missed. A special thanks to the many, many inquiries I've received during the past couple of days. I can't wait for the start of our program.
I meant to take and post pictures, but as usual I got so excited and was truly living and enjoying the moment, I completely forgot to take picture to share. Thank you also to everyone who sent blessings, flowers and good wishes. You were missed. A special thanks to the many, many inquiries I've received during the past couple of days. I can't wait for the start of our program.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)