Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Faith

Most things in life require a leap of faith. Life is fluid and ever evolving. You could know a person for years and at some point you choose to keep things the way they are or take a leap of faith and marry them. I know couples that took things slow and steady. Couples who got to know each other over years and still their relationship ended in divorce. I know couples that took a leap of faith just months after meeting and they are still together, going strong. I also know couples where the opposite is true. People will say it didn't work out because they jumped into their relationship or because they married once the relationship was stagnant, they had know each other for too a long time. Truth is, we never know how things will work out or why some things do work out and other don't. In the end, you either take a leap of faith or you stop growing.

Home schooling requires a huge leap of faith. I love teaching my kids, but as much as I love it, I struggle with having faith that I am teaching them what I'm supposed to be teaching and that they will learn what they need to learn. Anyone else on this boat with me? I struggle so much with it, that it has become the theme for this year. Last year my fear of not teaching the kids what they needed was so vast that I enrolled them in a virtual school. I have no complaints about the school, except that I am so used to having my own curriculum that I felt their was stifling. What I learned was that some things presented were completely new to my kids. I had never covered it. Most things however were will below their cognitive level. I'm not saying that my kids are particularly intelligent, but I do think that by allowing them to be curious, by giving them one on two attention, by linking learning to real life experiences they really get to know their stuff. You would think that after that experience I would have tremendous faith that this road I've chosen for my kids is the right one, but you'd be wrong to think so.

"Doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith is his twin brother."
~
Khalil Gibran
~

I often write about trusting the process and I think it's time to start following my own advice, but how? That is always the tricky part isn't is? Well I have a plan. It's simple, it's straightforward and it will work. I've always worked with a foggy plan. Since it was not my intent to actually home school my plan was lacking. It was written down, but it never felt serious. It never felt like I was a teacher. Things changed a bit last year when I opened the preschool. For the preschool I have a definite plan. I have a rhythm, a mission statement, policies, a degree and I'm licensed. I'm a real teacher for young ones. This year I'm also a real teacher for my kids. The e-course I'm taking through Fairy Dust Teaching is awesome. It's taking me step by step in organizing my plan. It takes into a account state standards (which I has never done before), there is a theme, there is the putting all together in a notebook. It's perfect. There are however a few more things I need to work on to make this year successful.

I need to practice having faith. I have deep faith in God, but sometimes it's difficult to let go of the reins, even when I don't know where I'm going. This year the route (plan) is clear and I'm handing the reins over to a greater power. I'll do the work, but I'm not going to be responsible for the outcome. I promise to be present, to work hard and do my best. My kids need to be present and do their part. I have to have faith that the results will follow. I need to trust the process and that my kids, whether home schooled or in a brick and mortar setting will get the knowledge they need to be successful. In case I forget I posted the following quote on the front of my curriculum notebook:

"There is nothing that wastes the body like worry, and one who has any faith in God should be ashamed to worry about anything whatsoever."
~Mahatma Gandhi~